reading Dacher Keltner’s book, Born To Be Good, so we are now ready to discuss the first 4 chapters!
Let’s discuss…
1. Jen Science
2. Darwins Joys
3. Rational Irrationality
4. Survival of the Kindest
For this conversation, I would like us to take a round-table approach, as we would in an on-campus senior seminar. This means that I am going to keep this very open to what you would like to discuss about the reading. What did you learn from these 4 chapters? What did you think about what you learned? What can we gain from the knowledge of the evolutionary underpinnings of positive emotion and emotional intelligence?
Looking forward to diving into this book from one of our most esteemed happiness scientists! 🙂
Add an external source from anything, youtube, article, tedtalk, podcast. As long as it relates to the science of happiness.
“1) Jen Science
What a really interesting introduction to this book. I had no idea what to expect because I had not heard about Jen before. One quote I particularly liked was when Keltner was describing what Jen is “A person of Jen ‘brings the good things of others to completion and does not bring the bad things of others to completion.”
I also thought the idea of the Jen Ratio to be incredibly interesting and something I might try to calculate in my own life. Life needs balance, and there is never going to be no “bad stuff,” but having more of the “good stuff” is essential. “High Jen ratios are proving to be a hallmark of healthy societies.”
I found it particularly startling how much the U.S has fallen in Jen over the last 15 years, with a drop of 15% points. I guess this is not super surprising but still not what you want to hear. Jen is about a mixture of kindness, humanity, and respect between people, and how much that has gone away is upsetting. Sadly, U.S children ranked twentieth in terms of overall well-being. We are wired to pursue self-interests and avoid the bad, but there is also a drive to help others or give to those in need.
Overall from this chapter, the most interesting part was learning that money can only buy you happiness to a point. Having very little money can make a world of difference in your overall happiness. Still, If you are from the upper-middle class, it is romantic bonds and connections within a community that make you happy. This idea reminds me of Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs, ones the lowest needs are met that it was you can start moving up towards self-actualization.
After reading this first chapter, I wonder how we can start to raise our Jen ratio as a society? First, I think it needs to become more common knowledge.
2) Darwin’s Joys
I really liked the list of all of Darwin’s descriptions of emotional expression. It’s just so impressive that he could do that during that time. I also find it so interesting that whenever (Ekman in this instance) someone presents a new idea that challenges an old way of thinking, people lose their minds instead of embracing learning and discovering new information. Do you think we will ever learn from the past and not be so quick to shut out new ideas and ways of thinking?
From this chapter, I found it so fascinating That Ekman and his college Friesen were about to objective measure emotions using facial anatomy. I learned all about this in the social psyc class I took back during my sophomore year. I was so interested in it then, and it still is so cool that we have all these involuntary facial movements that show our emotions.
3) Rational Irrationality
One quote that stood out to me in this chapter is, “Words are easy to manipulate. Not so, emotional displays”.
This is an interesting chapter, especially the part about the moral gut. Some things are just so gross (like the chicken sex story), and it is so amazing that these expressions of disgust are seen so easily in our facial expressions. Our emotions provide us with speedy insight. They are our guides in life. The last thing we should do is dismiss our emotions or see them are something to fight. Seeing as emotions allow for social commitment, its no wonder that to have a meaningful life with a high Jen ratio, we need to experience compassion, gratitude, and aw. Those things seem to be lacking in so many peoples lives, particularly compassion.
4) Survival of the Kindest
I love the theory that kindest or tendencies toward goodness are evolved characteristics that have been passed down from generations. It speaks to the notion that there is good in all of us. Its so clear that our species became so advanced and able to survive because of our ability to work as a group or community. Unfortunately, as we have become more advanced in recent times, there is less emphasis on community and more on individuals, which may be why our Jen ratio has dropped so much.
I found it particularly interesting how social intelligence is what determines who advances in group
