There are many broken or disconnected parts to your thesis. For example, after reading the first two chapters (all that was provided). Editor couldn’t tell whether you’re writing a research proposal or if you’re working on the final project. I have a ton of grammar, mechanics, and narrative issues. The overall framework of your research needs immediate attention. My overall Begin with Chapter 1 and build a solid research premise. There were a couple of places where an insertion was required to ensure that a good point you made could be retained without overstatement, which was unintentional. Need to bring the research closer to the topic.
My committee professor stated this :
Some of the work will be creating a clear outline as you have text/information in sections where they don’t belong.
The strongest advice I can give you is keep it simple. Stick to the one point rather than adding in tangential points as you write. This can feel like you are not saying enough and it will help increase the clarity and flow. Right now there is a lot of jumping around or information in places where it doesn’t belong.
I need an editor to help me with this because APA7 format and address the issues in the editors document , its cruch time for me need help, Ive attached my editor commented document to address & my orginal paper as reference .
