I have attached my essay with the revisions that need to be made.
Can you improve my essay and fix any errors and fix the things my instructor suggested.
Here are some of my instructor’s comments:
Great effort on this draft! You let the reader know what the general topic of your essay will be, and got them thinking about Thunberg will be addressing the world’s leaders regarding the urgency of climate change, as well as that this essay will be a rhetorical analysis of an article written about the topic.
Excellent job analyzing the speech throughout the essay. While the analysis of devices is good, you want to work on the following to improve:
1. Use more specific language to make connections between ideas more clear.
2. Be sure to include more about how a device was used to make the audience think or feel a certain thing.
2. Conclusion. Discuss more the impact of her speech and the many awards she won, especially the Nobel Peace Prize.
